This is a story retold.
Way back when I was still a resident at Ilang-Ilang Residence Hall in UP-Diliman, I heard a quite interesting story from one of our speakers in one of our annual formal dinners. She told a story about a husband and wife who have been together for so long, maybe too long.
One day, the husband asked his wife “Do you love me?” and the wife replied, “for 25 years i have washed your dirty laundry, ironed your clothes, cooked food for you…etc.”. The answer apparently, did not make sense to the husband, so he asked again, “Do you love me?” and the wife again retorted, “for 25 years i have washed your dirty laundry, ironed your clothes, cooked food for you…etc.”. The husband, dumbfounded, walked away.
Not a happy story isn’t it? I myself did not understand the meaning of the story until the speaker spoke of the “5 Languages of Love”, namely:
2. Physical Touch
3. Affirmation/Words of Confirmation
4. Quality/Quantity Time
5. Acts of Service
These are the languages of love. The medium each and every one of us use to convey our love. The tricky part is, we may not have the same language.
In the story, for instance, the husband’s language of love is a simple affirmation. He only needed to hear words of confirmation that his wife love him and it could have been enough. However, the wife has another language – acts of service. For her, so long as she keeps on doing things for her husband she feels that she is showing him her love.
Not having the same language of love is not the reason for a relationship to fail. But the inability to even try understand your partner’s language of love and the unwillingness to compromise will assure defeat.
So have you asked yourself today? What is my language of love? And what is my partner’s language of love.
I hope you find the answer. 🙂